As a parent, do you ever feel like this…?
Samantha, I struggled not to feel left out when my sons were younger.
They were incredibly athletic and weren’t interested in much of anything outside of baseball. But, I was not well-versed in sports, or particularly athletic, so when they’d talk ball, I would feel confused and out of the loop.
Have you ever felt like this as a parent?
For some, their children pursue skills or hobbies that are familiar to them. Their kids ‘follow in their footsteps’ and they can easily relate to the things that their kids are excited about.
But for other parents, myself included, our children go in a different direction and pursue interests that are completely foreign to us.
When this is the case, it can be difficult not to feel excluded and to avoid the urge to suggest our kids pursue something that we do have experience with.
We might not even realize we’re doing this, because it’s completely natural to want to be involved in our children’s lives.
So, how do we handle feeling left out or like we’re completely in the dark when it comes to our child’s interests?
Recognize that they’re on their own path and accept that that’s okay.
This is not always easy to do, but it’s something that is crucial for our children.
When we take a step back and put our own feelings aside, we’re giving our children the space and support they need to figure out what their gifts are, what brings them joy, and ultimately, where their path will lead as they become adults in the future.
Sometimes, at the dinner table, my sons would talk stats and repeat play-by-plays. I would sit there completely confused and wishing I could relate to them more.
But, even if I couldn’t understand this passion they had for baseball, I could still share in their excitement and I could still encourage them to continue pursuing this thing they loved so much. And that’s how we can recapture that feeling of connection when we’re feeling left out.